Ah, that’s a common misunderstanding: “conservatives” have a list of “special oppressed groups” as well. But there’s only one group on it: bible-thumping white men. After all, we know they’re the “only group that you can still oppress!!!”

Sniff sniff. It’s all just so unfair!

And the idea that a “conservative” has any standing to talk about logic and reason after the anal rape that the GOP has performed on pretty much every science-oriented department in the federal government demonstrates a level of denial so deep, it’s eerie to even ponder.

But of course, I’m sure you’re one of those “principled conservatives” who don’t dismiss the last eight years as “impure conservatism”, just as I’m sure there are octogenarian dead-ender Soviet holdouts, claiming that “Communism failed because it was never implemented!”